Just Don't Give Up on Me 8/20

[rain_n_snow]

Jensen woke with a start, taking a moment to remember where he was and why. Jared was pressed against his back, warmth pervading his skin, surrounding him with the arm thrown over his middle. Jensen shifted slightly and was pulled in tighter to the large form behind him, receiving a grunt in response to his movement. Smiling, he turned his head to see Jared’s face close, relaxed and innocent in sleep.

Despite the discomfort of his position, Jensen lay watching Jared for several long minutes, cataloguing the younger man’s face. Not that he hadn’t long ago memorized every inch, but never this close; never had he been afforded this intimate a view. He took in the smooth golden skin and beautiful bone structure. Jared was just about as perfect in Jensen’s eyes as a person could be.

“Stop staring,” Jared mumbled, squeezing Jensen tighter, flattening his hand against his lower abdomen, slipping under Jensen’s tshirt , and smoothing the soft skin there.

Jensen started out of his reverie and his eyes flew up to meet Jared’s barely open, sleep filled ones. “Sorry.” Jensen shifted his gaze, letting his head fall back to the pillow, embarrassment causing his face to redden as he ducked away from Jared.

Jiggling the man in his arms slightly, Jared said, “Hey, Jen, I was only kidding. You can stare at me all you want. Turn around, so I can appreciate the view, too.”

Jensen felt his blush heat up even more and he resisted momentarily. “No, I was just…sorry…”

Jared kissed the back of Jensen’s neck and breathed in his sleep sleep warm scent. He pulled Jensen around, manhandling him into turning to face him. Jensen felt a stirring in his cock at this reminder of the size and strength of Jared. He had never been with anyone larger than him and the fact that it was such a turn on was a surprise. He had discovered his interest in men early, no more than fourteen or fifteen years old. Had attempted a relationship right out of high school that had ended quickly and painfully for him, and after he left for Hollywood, he knew it was no longer a possibility if he wanted a career in acting. So a few kisses, awkward groping, a little public humiliation and a few secret tears over being let know he wasn’t enough for someone had left him with no good memories of being with another guy. But this was Jared, and he had never wanted anything or anyone more, not acting, not the multitude of girls he had been with or been seen with over the years, nothing.

Once they were face to face, Jared tucked a finger under Jensen’s chin and tilted his head back to meet his eyes. “Hey, I was only kidding, Jense, really. I think it’s awesome you want to look at me, and trust me, I want to look at you. I’ve spent a lot of time trying to not look at you, and that’s gotten old. Now that I’m allowed, I want to.”

Jensen’s lips tilted up in a small smile and his eyes flitted away quickly. Jared found it absolutely captivating that Jensen could be the least humble or unaware of his effect on everyone around him, so oblivious to his own allure. Surely in the abstract he had to know he was attractive, but he didn’t get the reality behind his own worth as a person and someone others would want to be with, to know and be thrilled to call their own.

“You’re beautiful, Jen. You know that, of course. Not like you haven’t heard it your whole life. But, it’s more than that, you’re gorgeous on the inside and when I look at you I see that as well as the perfect face. Ya know? I could stare at you for hours…have, actually. I can’t believe you haven’t caught me, considering. But I can look at you and see something new every time, because you are such an awesome person and so much more than the pretty face.” It was Jared’s turn to flush and he huffed out a small laugh, “Damn, I sound like a girl, huh? How fucking sappy was all that?”

Brushing his knuckles along the blushing check in front of him, Jensen tried to steady his breath. No one had ever wanted Jensen for more than his face or his fame or some elusive, surface, fleeting thing. It felt good. So very good, and he understood, because no matter how hot Jared was, that wasn’t what had made him fall in love. “It wasn’t stupid or sappy, Jared. It was…really nice. And I get it, I do…cuz looking at you, well…let’s just say I’ve done enough of my own looking to know what you mean, and you have no idea how gorgeous you are, man. You take my breath away sometimes, J. You just light up the room, you make everyone happier just by being around, and that shows. You practically glow with it, and it’s hard not to stare.”

Leaning in, Jensen slid his fingers to the nape of Jared’s neck, tangling in the silky hair there before pulling Jared’s lips into a soft, exploring kiss. Groaning softly, Jensen quickly deepened the connection, tongue sliding along the seam to request entry into the warm cavern inside.

Immediately opening for Jensen and any exploration he cared to do, Jared’s fingers dug into the soft skin of Jensen’s waist before slipping under his shirt to his back, pulling him closer, their bodies almost flush against one another. He could feel the hard line of Jensen’s arousal pressed close to his own, and combined with the intense feeling of the kiss they were sharing drew a long sighing moan from his lips, which Jensen drank in.

They lay there for hours, kissing and running hands over soft skin of hard muscled backs and silken hair, neither moving to take things further. Content to just explore each other’s mouths and relish the closeness they had both silently, secretly waited for and wanted for so long.

chap 9a



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master post/all chaps here